Sally Has Her First Oscar!

I got my first Oscar last week. I’ve been writing screenplays for years and envisioned the golden statute residing proudly in the music room. Other times I thought I could have a special shelf made in my office. However, when Oscar came into my life I never expected that he would spend a lot of the day sitting proudly on the bottom shelf of an end table in the living room. I especially never thought that the floor under the table would be littered with poo balls.

Oh, I guess there is a detail I forgot to tell you. Oscar was not the result of an award-winning script. Oscar is our new pet bunny.

Our last bunny recently passed away. None of our bunnies ran to greet us at the door and wag their tails, or jump into our laps demanding attention. But life without a bunny was strangely sad and quiet. We missed the pitter patter of bunny paws, the slurp, slurp slurp from the water bottle and the clanging of toys being tossed around the cage. My spouse, CB, probably would have grieved longer after the passing of Tinkle Toes, our last bunny, but there are so many pets that need homes, I didn’t see the point in waiting. We adopted Oscar from the Bunny Rescue in East Mesa, AZ. I applaud the owner, Angel, and her devoted staff of volunteers. If you are looking to adopt a pet bunny or cat, or you are looking for a charitable organization to donate to, this is a very worthy cause.

But back to our bunny tale.

Oscar is quite the character. At times he stands up on his haunches and looks around, pokes his nose into anything new and occasionally makes us laugh when he jumps straight up into the air. Other times he seems quite content to sit quietly, wait until we are lulled into a false sense of security and sneak a nibble on the carpet or throw rug.

I have always enjoyed having a pet, but usually the animal of choice has been a dog. When I was a child we had both dogs and cats. But CB is allergic to cats and we travel too much for a dog, so bunnies have been our companions.

There isn’t anything cuter than a baby bunny, but this time I felt an adult rabbit, one who was friendly and enjoyed human interaction, would be a better choice. Oscar fit the bill.

Even though we have had pet bunnies in the past, I went online to read up on bunny care. I learned a few things. However, I didn’t feel too bad that I wasn’t an expert. I have two grown children and there are things that were acceptable for babies raised in the 1980s that are not in vogue today. One example is those cute bumper pads in the cribs. I had bumpers for each of my daughters and it even came with a matching baby quilt and curtains. Who would have expected that these cushy pads could become a choking hazard? So my granddaughters did not have bumper pads in their cribs and their mom didn't eat sushi during her pregnancy. Who knew? The point is there is always something new to learn, whether it's child care of bunny care, do your research.

I don’t want to make this an educational piece. If you google bunny rescue and include your state and city, you will find adoptable pets as well as information on pet care. The same is true for other critters such as dogs and cats and even ferrets.

Having a pet is an important responsibility and not something that should be taken lightly. However, if you have done your research, have realistic expectations and have room in your heart for a new pet, please consider adopting one from the humane society, animal shelter, or one of many rescue organizations.

To my friends and family members who saw the headline to this story and thought I earned the coveted “Golden Boy” for Best Script, I apologize. But don’t despair (I’m still hopeful.) My screenplays may not have earned a gold statuette (yet) but now that I have my Oscar in the house I have created my own wonderful story and we pleased to report that are all living “hoppily” ever after.

Goodbye Tinkle Toes

Our pet bunny, Tinkle Toes, passed away this morning. Even though we were expecting his death was eminent, the reality of the inevitable did not diminish our sadness. Thankfully, our pet seemed to die peacefully in his sleep. We buried him in the forest this morning before CB had to go in for work.

Tinkle Toes was a small, black, Lionhead bunny. We got him when he was about six weeks old and could fit in the palm of my hand. CB went into the mall for new glasses and the pet store was right next door. The litter of fuzzy lionheads was just too tempting and we both returned the next day to add another pet bunny to our household.

We had hoped that Tinkle Toes was a girl as we already had a male bunny and two males do not get along (unless they are from the same litter.) We looked in between Tinkle’s legs to determine his gender. We couldn’t tell, nor could any of the folks in the pet store. However, when we brought him home our other bunny, Romeo, knew instantly and wanted to bite him.

This behavior was unusual for Romeo as he was a very good natured bunny, but instincts are instincts. We had the bunnies in separate cages, but one time Tinkles poked his nose a little too close to Romeo’s and got a quick nip in the schnozola. However, CB, patiently introduced the bunnies to each other a little at a time and eventually they not only tolerated each other, they became best friends. When Romeo passed away, Tinkle Toes was right by his side.

Tinkle Toes traveled more than the average lagomorph. He loved to go camping. He had a cage in the back of the camper that rested on a shelf, but when we were driving he had a “bunny bin” and sat between us in the cab. Whenever we stopped at rest stops or campsites, we had a special travel bin (a mesh-like laundry bag) with two dinner-plate sized holes cut out so Tinkles could be in a safe, enclosed pen, but could still chomp on the grass. And chomp he did. Eating green grass was one of his favorite past times. He especially liked the little white flowers from clover. As sick as he was, he still managed to eat a couple of the flowers before he passed away. I brought in a couple more of the tasty tidbits, but those lay untouched in his cage that I cleaned this morning. But at least he died among his favorite things.

Losing a pet is a sad thing, even when you know death is near. Tinkle Toes did not seem to be suffering and I’m thankful for that. He brought a lot of joy to our lives and we have many happy memories. Feeling both the joy and pain of loving someone is part of what makes us human. It reminds me of a quote by Anatole France, "Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened."

After we buried our bunny, the morning light filtered through the trees and created a bright spot on the ground very close to where Tinkles was laid to rest. There are many times when I bumble about and forget to notice the beauty of the world around me. It brought this quote by St. Francis of Assisi to mind.

"Ask the beasts and they will teach you the beauty of this earth."

I felt the luminescence was a sign that our little bunny’s spirit was in a better place and if I shifted my consciousness, I could be in a better place as well.

I cannot truthfully say that this moment in the sun erased my sadness. I will miss our little pet. I will remember how he would stand up on his back legs to eat a treat, the way he would sneak out and make me chase him through the house, and how happy he was plop down in the grass and eat dandelions and clover. It’s okay that I am sad. It’s okay that I take this nostalgic trip down the last five years of our fur baby’s life. I agree with Lacie Petitto who said,

“A pet is never truly forgotten until it is no longer remembered."

And I intend to remember Tinkle Toes and all the wonderful pets who have shared their lives with me. It is ironic that is the love and devotion of animals that best teach us how to be human.

I do not have the funds to add a wing to a pet hospital or create a refuge for animals. However, I can do what I have always done, respect the earth and its creatures, make environmentally sound choices, support “no kill” shelters, the humane society and PETA.

One day, I’m not sure when, we will adopt another bunny or two. Even though I feel the loss of our bunny, it would sadder still to punish ourselves further by refusing to allow another pet to enter our lives. I believe Gary Kowalski, author of The Souls of Animals, said it best.

"It is not just that animals make the world more scenic or picturesque. The lives of animals are woven into our very being - closer than our own breathing - and our soul will suffer when they are gone."

Good bye Tinkle Toes. You will be missed, but never forgotten.

Dumb Bunny?

I have heard the expression “Dumb Bunny” used for years. Our pet rabbit does not appreciate this term. Tinkles is a sensitive creature and a tad grouchy. I don’t want to upset him so I try not to use the “dumb bunny” idiom. In fact, our pet is not only a smart little hopper, he was a catalyst for an enlightening experience.

We recently went on a combination vacation and book tour. Tinkles came along for the ride. He has a shelf in the back of the camper which houses his bunny cage. He has a traveling bin in the front of the truck cab as well. While my spouse, CB and I admired the rolling landscape, Tinkles was trolling for bites of moist, green grass.

We live in sunny Arizona so a mouthful of unfertilized, pesticide-free grass is not easily available. Tinkles has to settle for hay, grain and the occasional carrot or peanut. However, while we were on the road – camping or in a hotel – the Northern California Coast provided grass galore. CB created a makeshift pen for Tinkles from a small laundry basket. CB cut a dinner plate-sized hole in the bottom of the pen so we can place it on the grass and Tinkles can eat grass to his little heart’s content.

During our road trip our "fur baby" was in bunny heaven. Unfortunately, our vacation came to an end. Returning to Arizona was a bit of a culture shock. The desert climate resembled Dante’s inferno more than a lagomorph’s verdant paradise. Tinkles’ daily servings of delicious, moist and tasty grass reverted back to a handful of dried hay. Upon reflection, I think the expression “What the hay!” came from an unsatisfied rabbit. Of course it could have been Mr. Ed. But I digress. Anyway, when we returned home, Tinkles turned his nose up at his Arizona meals. He begrudgingly ate his grain, but he ignored his hay. He had been a happy camper, but he was not a happy bunny.

For about two weeks Tinkles refused to eat his hay. I did not want him to get constipated so I did not increase his grain. He complained by tossing his little dish around. He also refused to be held for longer than a minute. He remembered better times (and meals) and he was going to hold out until the green grass returned.

This probably sounds like the amusing behavior of a silly rabbit. However, how many times have we done something similar? We suffer a setback and refuse to allow joyful moments to penetrate our hearts and minds. Or we put a stipulation on our happiness such as: “I will be happy when I get a better job.” “I’ll be happy when I’m in a relationship.” We hold our personal joy hostage to these possible happier outcomes that may or may not happen in the future. It’s like Tinkles holding out for greener pastures.

To make matters worse, many of us disregard the blessings we encounter every day. Instead we chose to replay our miserable stories from the past. It’s as if our brain is a DVD player and we keep playing the snippets from the saddest moments of our lives. And we don’t just play this melodrama once. We play it over and over again.

This practice is a lot more masochistic than we may realize. Kebba Buckley Button’s new book, Peace Within, quotes research from a medical conference in 1995 that stated that if a person holds onto a negative thought for five minutes, the parasympathetic nervous system is adversely affected in eight factors for six hours!

In our book Erase Negativity and Embrace the Magic Within, my friend and co-author Jacqueline and I wrote about several examples of living optimistically, as well as providing tips on how to erase negativity and enjoy a happier life. A couple of simple suggestions include reciting positive affirmations every day and showing ongoing appreciation for the many positive things we enjoy.

For instance, we take breathing for granted. However, if you were drowning, suffering an asthma attack or choking, your next breath would be more important than anything else in your life. When that next breath finally filled your lungs, wouldn't you be be ecstatic?

Therefore, to keep us on the happy track, I suggest we constantly remind ourselves of what we are grateful for. One of my favorite unattributed quotes is: “Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” The more time we spend time showing gratitude the less likely we will have to replay the sad songs of our past.

Erasing or reducing negativity is not easy. However, it can be done. The important thing is to take the first step. Of course I hope it will start with reading our book, but ANY effort is a step in the right direction. And if you enjoy the book, don’t keep it to yourself. Pass it on and encourage others to read it. Also, please contact your local library and ask them to carry the book so those who do not have $12.99 to spare, can read it for free.

We all want to be happy, but often we forget our way. Whether we are holding on to past hurts and ignoring the joys that are present today, or remembering better times and refusing to move forward is not the road to happiness. It is more like a freeway to frustration.

Even our pet bunny knows how silly it is to stay immersed in this futile behavior. A few days ago Tinkles starting eating his alfalfa again. He may prefer fresh grass, but when he realized his surliness was not going to improve his diet, he gave up and ate what I gave him.

So why not take a lesson from Tinkles and forget about the past and enjoy what there is to enjoy right now? With apologies to Bobby McFerrin “Don’t worry. Be hoppy/happy.”